That’s all the time I have left. And no, I’m not talking about pregnancy. Well, at least not of a flesh and blood baby.
I’ve got 30 weeks left before I submit my dissertation—18 weeks to complete the full rough draft and 12 to edit the massive sucker. Nearly a decade of pursuit and half-assery is finally coming to a head.
Not surprisingly I’ve been thinking a lot about things recently—in between crazy internal freak-outs at my rapidly diminishing time frame.
My future is like a long dark tunnel. I can see a bit of light at the end now, but I don’t know where that light leads. Hell, I still don’t know which country I’ll be living in come January. And to get to this mysterious endpoint, I have to trek through that tunnel full of mental blocks, weariness and scary unknowns ... as well as my cranky but well-intentioned supervisor.
Amidst all this chaos and confusion is my running.
Training for my second marathon has been rather enlightening. I’ve discovered I don’t really care for long runs—at least not anything over 13 miles. Well, I don’t like them now anyway. They’re also a massive time-suck. On average I run them at a 12 minute per mile pace. That means for a 20 miler I trudge along for at least 4 hours. That’s hella long.
Running is beginning to seem like a chore to me now and that’s not what I want. I need running to be my release, the way I can decompress after a shite day of staring at the same Excel spreadsheets and tables and wondering how the hell I’m supposed to make all that mumbo jumbo understandable to a field full of academics who aren’t mathematically-savvy.
So I’ve decided that Edinburgh will be my last marathon for a while. In fact, it is likely my last race of 2010. I need to prioritize now and my dissertation and re-discovering my love of running have to come first.
Which leads me to the blog.
A little while ago, Nitmos wrote a post about the reasons people blog. Initially for me it was about accountability as I first stuck my toe into the running pool. Now it has become an on-going, informative and hilarious conversation with like-minded people. I learn new things about running and along the way I get to take the piss out of a good number of you. It’s a good outlet seeing as apparently there’s only so much sarcasm and mockery my real life peeps can take before they revolt. Huh, who knew.
But Diggin’ It always had a fixed endpoint. The tagline is “the life and times of an archaeology PhD student”. Either by completion or failure, that status will change in the new year. My question now is whether I should end the blog sooner rather than later.
There are two main issues—time and material. From here on out, I’ll be spending more time working. Therefore I need to have fewer distractions while still maintaining some outlets so I don’t go completely mad. However, with no races on the calendar and no specific running improvement plans, I’m wondering how much running-related material I’ll actually have to talk about. See the dilemma?
My options are to keep the blog going and post less frequently or to end it after running the Edinburgh marathon at the end of May. I’ve decided to go with the first option. But if, post-marathon, the well dries up, Diggin’ It will enter early retirement.
As for post-grad life ... I have contemplated starting a new blog. Something that would make me less identifiable, because I don’t want my future students to stumble upon the blog and realize it’s me. My current shtick is being a running grad student living in a foreign country. The new blog wouldn’t be able to contain anything about my profession, exactly where I live, race times or possibly even specific race names. I don’t know what my angle would be, hence why the new blog is still only a thought.
I’m not posting this to be melodramatic or as a cry for attention. It’s just me thinking out loud. It was through writing this post that I was able to come to a decision at all. I just thought I’d give you all a heads up so that when the time does come you’re not taken unawares.
And so this post doesn’t become a total downer, let me just remind you which race I’m running on Sunday.
Oh yes, there will be nuns.
Have a great weekend, everyone.