Wednesday, 8 December 2010

Not well-heeled

Way back in October I mentioned that my right foot had been hurting. Turns out it was plantar fasciitis. What I’ve neglected to mention is that I’m still dealing with it.

The pain is always there but has recently flared up again. Big time. Walking is a total trial now. I’ve tried different shoes, with the inserts, without the inserts. It doesn’t seem to matter—my foot still hurts. Yesterday I wore my running shoes for the walk into town. I still had pain in my foot but thanks to the extra heel cushioning I didn’t limp as badly.

I’m rolling my foot on a tennis ball daily and am now incorporating achilles tendon stretches into my morning routine. I’ll look for a heel cushion at Boots today. Other than that, I have absolutely no idea what to do.

Cycling is out because of the weather and Aeolus desperately needs new brakes. I need to be able to walk, people. It’s been almost two months already. Something needs to happen soon or I’m going to completely lose it.

Since I’m hurting, I need others to hurt too. So here’s your dose of pain. And yes, it involves math.

I’ve been using a tennis ball canister to collect my loose change. After about a year and a half, it’s finally full.

I want you to guess how much money is in it.

As I hope to one day walk again without pain, I will add some pleasure to your pain.

I have more bottle openers to give away.
The foot with the now slightly rusty metal bit is from my trip to Santorini and the other is a horrific ripoff of Braveheart which Theresa kindly sent to me from Edinburgh.

As usual, there are Popeners. Two are of John Paul with a bird’s eye view of St Peters on the reverse. The other is of Benedict and it has a magnet on the back.

The person whose guess is closest to the correct amount will win their choice from this fine pile of kitschy crap. I will then have pick four people onto whom I can foist the rest of these atrocities.

I’ll give you some useful info to help with your guesses.

-The canister originally contained three tennis balls. It is c. 8.25 inches (21 cm) tall and has a diameter of c. 2.75 inches (7 cm).
Next to my little Christmas tree. Cheap, yes, but festive all the same.

-The canister has a footed bottom so it’s not a perfect cylinder.

-The canister only contains 1p, 2p, 5p and 10p coins. The 20p, 50p and pound coins are too valuable so they stay in my wallet. Here’s a scaled photo of the coins with the US coins I had on hand for comparison.
In order from left to right: (top row) 1p coin, 2p coin, 5p coin and a 10p coin.
For the Kanadian readers: (bottom row): penny, dime and quarter.

Post your guesses for how much British money the tennis ball canister contains in the comments section of this post by 5 pm EST on Sunday, December 12. I’ll even allow each of you to make up to three guesses cuz I’m generous like that. I’ll announce the winners on Monday. And to save you the wait of international post (and me the expense) I’ll send the prizes once I’m back in the states later next week.

All right, folks, get to guessing...and to commiserating with me about my f*cked up foot.

I crave your pity.

Later gators.


Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

... my right foot had been hurting. Turns out it was plantar fasciitis.

Fuck the coins. I know my Latin. Who planted fascists in your foot?

It is important that you see a doctor immediately, because the first thing foot fascists do is attack the little muscles¹, or, in Latin, "Mussolini", which is NOT good (or, in Latin, "Benito").

The up side? Even though you can't walk, run or ride a bike, the trains should run on time for you.
¹ Incidentally, foot fetishists behave the exact same way. But that is Benito.

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...


What do I win?

Turi said...

Those are some pretty creepy bottle openers.

But I'll guess... 28 pounds.

The Merry said...

Are you still swimming? Maybe your heel is refusing to heal because it wants that chlorine rush. I hope it decides to play nice soon.
Maybe you could do squat instead ;)

Jamoosh said...

76 pounds!

GeorgiaSnail said...

23.45 pounds....

SteveQ said...

In the picture of the canister, on the top left is a large copper coin that looks like a penny (or half-penny) from before decimalization. Can't guess until I know what it is.

SteveQ said...

Oh sure... blame my vision. Way to kick a guy when he's down. When I got robbed this week, the guy took my effing glasses! S.O.B. was just being mean.'s a penny. Got it.

Viper said...

39.49 pounds

It's been a couple months since you sent me an opener. Heal up that heel. (For what it's worth, I say strength is the answer, not more cushioning.) Cheers!

Jamie said...

42.37 pounds.

Good luck with that heel. I hope you are pain free and able to walk without a limp soon.

Nitmos said...

What is this 'pounds' everyone is talking about? I thought you wanted to know how much it was worth not how much it weighs?

I'll go with 45 "pounds" but that's just because everyone else is in this neighborhood. I have no idea what it means.

Tyger Lily said...

Long time reader, de-lurking to suggest you massage your calves. I'm an NMT practitioner and my peeps with plantar fasciitis have gnarly calves (mostly soleus) and want to kill me while I'm working on them but love me when they feel better. Just a suggestion :) Hope you have a great Christmas!

Deb said...

31 pounds. You might want to cash it in and splurge on a bigger Christmas tree. ALthough, I have to admit it's bigger than mine. (I refuse to put up our fake-ass, toxic Charlie Brown tree until the Girl Moose returns from college and pesters me into it. Bah freakin' Humbug.)